a look of need

It's a look I see a hundred times a day.
A look that conveys a need.
A need for a diaper change.
A need for food.
A need for a nap.
A need for a sippy cup in exactly the right color.
A need to play with his sister's markers.
A need to be understood.
A need for comfort.
It's an intense look, because toddlers are intense, needy, little people.
And I need him to stay looking this way for a long, long, time.

Isn't she lovely?

I get to spend this entire, crazy busy weekend with my baby sister. We have big plans to Christmas shop, see New Moon, eat sushi, drink coffee, gush about wedding plans, and oh yeah, run a 5K. Not such a big deal for Kellie, since she's been a marathon runner and college athlete and all. But a HUGE deal for me. Not an athlete, not a runner, not a lover of exercise or physical exertion in general. But I want to run to say that I've accomplished a goal and to feel good about succeeding at something way out of my comfort zone. It's an even BIGGER deal to have Kellie run it with me. Not only am I comforted to know that she will be by my side the entire time, but she's been by my side for every major event of my life.

Born 10 years after me, we are forever stuck a generation apart. I always sound like the old, mature, almost-mother and she always sounds like the young, naiive, full of life, almost-daughter. In spite of the age difference (or maybe because of it), I couldn't imagine having a more supportive or encouraging sister. As a kid, she tagged along to many band and piano concerts, college classes and even some of my dates. It's quite funny to look back at my wedding pictures and see the awkward 12 year old that was so unsure of herself. As a teen, she was there for the birth of my children, there to see the transition of her sister from a young married girl to a busy mom of 3. Today she is still here, now supporting my kids at every birthday party and major event for them, and in turn, still supporting me.

The difference between us is that I haven't always been able to be there for her. Always the one it has seemed with more responsibility and ties, I couldn't always pick up and travel to important soccer games and track meets. I didn't see every prom dress in person and yes, even missed the all important college graduation. It's for this reason that I am so excited about this next step in her life. In a little over 4 months, she is marrying a super, great, guy that I couldn't have hand picked any better for her. It hasn't always been an easy road for her in the dating department and I am so proud of her for not settling and for not losing sight of her standards. It's the reason I can't wait to be there for her on her special day. The day she starts a new life and I get to be right by her side cheering her on. It's a little tough to be another bridesmaid (excuse me, "Matron of Honor", which sounds even worse than bridesmaid. Who came up with that name anyway?) admist a sea of beautiful 20 something year olds who seem to have trouble gaining weight and who are probably blissfully unaware of the world of Spanx, but I would do it for my sister even if I was 50. I am even starting to get a little bittersweet as we spend some of our last times together with her as a single girl. Now I know why she clung to me so tightly in tears as I was trying to disentangle and leave for my honeymoon. We might be a generation apart, but the feelings and experiences we share are always mutual, always reciprocated, just always delayed. So thankful God blessed me with her beautiful smile of encouragement, so thankful for the man He brought to her life, and so thankful to be the one standing by her on her big day.


By the way, Kellie, don't expect any kind of crazy toast at your wedding that would include any of this mushy stuff. The most gushing you're going to get is right here. In April you won't be shocked when I sit quitely while toasts are being made. I refuse to be the matronly, Spanx wearing, mother of 3, 30 something year old that fell apart and became a mess while toasting her baby sister at her wedding. Not going to happen. :)

Love-Love

I remember this guy.


I remember this commercial.

I remember being quite taken with the hair, the attitude, the marriage and divorce to Brooke, the image. After this week, I see someone different. I see the story of a boy brainwashed from birth to pursue a sport he hated (his words) and the life that ensued from the pursuit of money, status, and peace. He was always chasing a dream, even if it wasn't his own. Less of a rebel and more of a lost soul. It's a truly fascinating read and well worth the $20 bucks. I love, love it.

A speech from a future president

Tonight, my oldest daughter informed me that she had memorized her first speech that she will give when she becomes President of the United States. I knew this was going to be good stuff, so I grabbed a pencil and paper to document this monumental occasion. Something tells me that we will enjoy reading this "speech" 20 years from now. ;) Here, I have shared the 3 main points of her speech as told by a 9 year old presidential wannabe with my own comments appearing in the italics. Enjoy, and God bless America.

1. I don't care if you vote for me or not, I'm really just here to have fun.
Ha! A candidate would probably be more likely to get my vote if they came out and said something as honest as that statement! Sure, there's the whole pressure of being leader of the free world and all, but let's face it, the job has some perks. Why would someone want to be president anyway unless it was a job that was going to be fun?

2. God has special plans for people's lives and if you vote for me, it will be a part of God's plan.
The wisdom of this astounds me. Yes, God does have special plans for our lives. Thank you Mackenzie for reminding me that God doesn't just have plans for us, but special plans. Yes, no matter who you vote for it is always a part of God's plan. He is always in control, no matter who is sitting in any elected seat. That is why I never really get too worked up over political issues. I will always do my part by voting, praying for our elected officials and staying current on issues, but I am certainly not worried that the government's plan for my life will circumvent God's special plans for me.

3. If you vote for me, we will be in the Guiness Book of World Records - your votes and my picture.
Well, I guess there is a little ego in every politician. What can I say? She's a little obsessed with the World Records right now and I she figures that being president will be the best way to guarantee her a spot in the book. I guess this is a better option than deciding to grow out her toenails or making the world's largest ball of ear wax.


I know I'm biased and all, but I would totally vote for this kid.

The best 30 days ever

The next 30 days of my life are set to be some of the most fun times! It's been a while since I have traveled anywhere exciting (unless you count Little Rock and the roach in our bed exciting), so I am giddy about all the next 30 days entails.

A ski trip to Colorado with a group of friends. I have no plans to ski since the little man is traveling with us, but I am looking forward to some fun adult conversation, time in a spa, and well, just some downtime. My hubby loves Colorado and he always makes our trips out there so fun and entertaining.

A day spent with the best sister a girl could ask for is planned, complete with Holiday Market shopping, sushi, and New Moon!! I'm not sure there could be a greater combo than that. I could think of no one I would rather gush about Edward with than my little sis. Yeah, we're one of those people. Don't hate.

A Thanksgiving spent with the greatest family on earth. We have so much to celebrate in our family this year with an upcoming wedding and a new brother-in-law-to be added to the mix. The boys always have a ton of fun, and the girls, well let's just say we are spending some time in a major shopping mecca. The day after Thanksgiving shopping? We're there. Can't wait.

A solo (plus little man again) trip to Florida to see my bff for my birthday. I love this girl and I cannot wait to jump on a plane and spend some time on her turf. What an awesome birthday gift I gave myself! Late night chit-chat sessions, watching movies, running around Florida. Counting down the days already!